Romance

Romantic love is a relative term, that distinguishes moments and situations within interpersonal relationships. There is often, initially, more emphasis on the emotions than on physical pleasure. Romantic love, in the abstract sense of the term, generally involves a mix of emotional and sexual desire for another as a person. However, Lisa Diamond, a University of Utah psychology professor, proposes that sexual desire and romantic love are functionally independent, and also, as an additional claim to the topic, that romantic love is not intrinsically oriented to same-gender or other-gender partners; and that the links between love and desire are bidirectional. Furthermore, Diamond does not state that one's sex has priority over another sex in romantic love, because as already mentioned Diamond's theory seems to purport the idea that it is possible for someone who is heterosexual to fall in love with someone of the same gender, and for someone who is homosexual to fall in love with someone of a different gender. Yet, within an existing relationship romantic love can be defined as a temporary freeing or optimizing of intimacy, either in a particularly luxurious manner (or the opposite as in the "natural"), or perhaps in greater spirituality, irony, or peril to the relationship. In other words, marriage is in conflict with romance--despite being combined to some degree, they are at odds with each other. Shakespeare in some of his plays, and Tolstoy and many others in their novels show this.^[1]

"Then plainly know my heart's dear love is set On the fair daughter of rich Capulet: As mine on hers, so hers is set on mine; And all combined, save what thou must combine By holy marriage: when and where and how We met, we woo'd and made exchange of vow, I'll tell thee as we pass; but this I pray, That thou consent to marry us to-day." --Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene II --by William Shakespear

Therefore, ''romantic love'' may also be classified according to two categories, "popular romance" and "divine"(or "spiritual") romance. '''Popular romance''' may include but is not limited to the following types: idealistic, normal intense (such as the emotional aspect of "falling in love"), predictable as well as unpredictable, consuming (meaning consuming of time, energy and emotional withdrawls and bids), intense but out of control (such as the aspect of "falling out of love") material and commercial (such as societal gain mentioned in a later section of this article), physical and sexual, grand and demonstrative. '''Divine (or spiritual) romance''' may include, but is not limited to realistic, as well as plausible unrealistic, optimistic as well as pessemistic (depending upon the particular beliefs held by each person within the relationship), abiding (e.g. the theory that each person had a predetermined stance as an agent of choice; such as "choosing a husband" or "choosing a soulmate."), non-abiding (e.g. the theory that we do not choose our actions, and therefore our romantic love involvment has been drawn from sources outside of ourselves), predictable as well as unpredictable, self control (such as obedience and sacrifice within the context of the relationship) or lack therof (such as disobedience within the context of the relationship), emotional and personal, soulful (in the theory that the mind, soul, and body, are one connected entity), intimate, and infinite (such as the idea that a god or God's love is or could be everlasting, if particular religious beliefs were in fact, true.) (Reference material: Romance In Marriage: Perspectives, Pitfalls, and Principles Jason S. Carroll http://ce.byu.edu/cw/cwfamily/archives/2003/Carroll.Jason.pdf)


source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Romantic_love